By: Marie Ellen Hargrieves

System here so they only visit every... every five or ten years!"

"Five or Ten--!" I wailed, "But that's... We can't... Ohmigod, Look!"

There were two smiling men approaching us, their loincloths pulled back to reveal their erect members. The one on Eric's side was smiling down at all the available apertures and the one on my side... he was on stilts, his randy erection just level with my petrified face!

I tried to turn away, to wiggle or squirm out, but my stiff wrappings hel me motionelss as the smiling, tanned native man approached. All I could do was jiggled my breasts and wiggled my pert bare buttocks, which only made him smile wider.

This was awful! I wanted to ask Eric when was the last time a Research team had been here? How many months or years -would we be stuck here like this, native slave girls in permanent bondage?

But It was no use. Neither on of us ripe, nude, bound women could speak with our mouths full!

TEND!

Coming Out...

The Reactions of Others

So many TVs live in fear of discovery. Some are paranoid to the point of fearing blackmail. Others desperately want to come out of hiding, but fear the reactions of friends and relatives. In some ways "coming out" is easier for a homosexual than a transvestite. More and more intelligent members of society are recognizing homosexuality as a viable alternate lifestyle. But the heterosexual transvestite is often scoffed by both gays and straight society.

My own experiences are as a transsexual. Before achieving

surgery, it was necessary to prove I could successfully live as a woman for at least one year, and face social and family pressures in so doing. Today I am a woman and suffer no social inconvenience, but that early transition period must have been exactly like being a transvestite, at least as far as people could tell. Jan Morris pointed out that the longer you live in a gender, the more you fit it, the better you are at being "you". But it doesn't come instantly, and for many months I was constantly embarrassed, teased, run through the mill and brought to tears.

It just isn't possible to jump from "male" to "female" instantly, and before I began the complete transition, I kept every thing a secret and dressed in private, never testing and perfecting my skills publicly. For some TVs, the need to pass in public is just as strong as in a TS though the ultimate goal of a transvestite might not be so radical.

The initial guilt and secrecy and fear of discovery may serve a purpose. It is like an apprenticeship, let's say, until we

learn at least the fundametals of becoming (either permanently or temporarily) female. There comes a time for many when the decision must be made: continued frustration or coming out.

By way of helping you belay your fear of possible bad reactions, the following is provided. It is a sort of "list" of important people in my life and how each reacted to the early stages of my change. Today, everybody accepts me in my new gender. But at first, it was very hard for certain members of my family.

I've changed the names of course, but the people are real.

Great Aunt Louise. One of my great aunts was the first person. I told showed, rather. After initial compliments on my appearance, she wanted to know little about TS and TV. Like many, she asked if I was (her word was) queer. Since then, we have become closer than ever. We now shop together and she accepts me as her neice rather than her nephew, though occassionally she still slips and calls me a "he". She's known me since I was very small, so it is to be expected. Her husband's reaction was one of contained humor and indifference.

Grandmother, mother's side. My great aunt had promised secrecy in those early stages of my change, but being very close to her sister, who is my grandmother it was just too big a secret to keep from her. My grandmother was my legal guardian through much of my childhood and, since she had really been a very poor parent, I think she felt a little responsible. She did not have me when was at the very young age that gender is established, however, and this may have given her